Thursday

November 12

1.  I feel extra grateful today!  The sun is shining, I feel good, my house is semi picked up and I don't have loads of things to tonight.  Less is always best!!!
2.  Emilee and Max are in the same seminary class today for the first time.  I transferred Max over to PG's seminary and I've always wanted Emilee to have a sibling to go to school with.  Even if its just one period it makes me happy!
3.  Max made the high school basketball team. I cried all night for those that didn't make it!!
4.  The fireplace
5.  We had the first snow fall this week.  We made soup and scones just like I promised Jayne.
6.  The Reflections at the school is over.  Hallelujah!  Lucy won Award of Excellence with her cute colored squirrel.
7.  I went to Abbie's CCR's today at school. She makes me proud!
8.  Halloween candy in the house.
9.  A quiet house for a bit to think.
10.  I found the CUTEST note today from Lucy to her dad.  It says..."Dear Dad, I know you have been in lots of stress but I want you to know that I love you and I'm here for you.  You are the best dad in the whole world and I don't know what I would do without you.  you help me with basketball and my homework.  your mine and I will be yours xoxoxo love Lucy."   I love that girl!!!!

Tuesday

October 13

* We went to La Casita last night with the kids.  Jason was craving it and Jayne bawled all the way there cause she didn't want to eat there.  She cries about most places we go to eat.  If it isn't Panda Express or have chicken nuggets she lets us know that she doesn't approve!
* This fall weather is unbelievable!
*  Sometimes a quite house with just my thoughts is nice.
*  I'm glad Emilee is still sleeping here and apart of our family.
*  I am grateful for a big washer and dryer!

Monday

October 12


*  I am grateful for weekends today.  It's Monday morning and I always feel better after having a weekend with my husband and kids at home.  The weekdays are such a whirlwind that it feels good to have a weekend of a little change and sometimes slower paced.
*  Yesterday was Henry's baby blessing.  He is the sweetest.  It was good to see  my 4 oldest sitting on a bench at church together in front of us.  I love having my family at church together!!!!  I also was glad that Jason could stand in the circle with  Lew.  He bore his testimony about his dad and Jason being his examples.
*  Last night was one of the best nights I remember.  It would have been perfect if Emilee was with us.  We went out to Day Break to look at houses.  The weather was beautiful and we found this awesome pond with a million ducks and the funnest parks.  We got out and walked around and played.  It was so fun to all be together and to watch my kids all play together.  That little community over there is a dream.
*  Max is back playing football again.  I've been a little hesitant whether he should play again or not.  I don't want  him hurt again.  He played GREAT!  I am continually amazed at what an Awesome little athlete he is.  He is naturally SO good and is so fun to watch!:)
*  I am always so grateful to my mom and dad.  They came down to watch Max's game on Saturday.  They are the best!  My mom also made Lucy the cutest little red riding hood cape for Halloween.  Lucy loved it and is so excited to wear it.  She is always to thoughtful and kind and I love her.  I also wish that maybe I had paid a little more attention in clothing in high school:)  Thank heavens for grandmas!

Tuesday

October 6

1.  I am grateful for a living prophet and General Conference.  It was an amazing weekend! I feel stronger from listening to the messages that were shared.  I loved Elder Bednar's closing talk of the Conference.  We belong to the greatest church in the world!!
2.  I am lucky to be blessed with so many girls to spend a girls night out during the Priesthood session.  We went to the Pizza Factory, then to the mall to visit Emilee, take photo booth pictures, and shop a little.  Grandma Clark joined us and it was fun!
3.  I am grateful for Dr. Kiser.  He is a miracle worker.  He healed Max's shoulder, and is helping me a lot with my foot.  What a blessing that Dad and Bob hooked us up with  him.  Max says "He is UNREAL and did me real good." :)
4.  I'm grateful that my kids have such a loving and wise dad.  I am continually amazed at the wisdom and council he is giving Emilee right now.
5.  Costco's chocolate turtles!
6.  I love spending nights over at the lot we are thinking about getting and dreaming.
7.  I'm grateful for a very capable husband.  Emilee's bug broke down on the way  home from work on Saturday night and he always knows what to do.  Saturday morning he drove it into down and into his trailer and transported  it down to Jimmy's love bug to get fixed.

Friday

October 2 2015

It's been a long month.... Hard, heart breaking, healing, loving, and lots of learning!!


*Chantz came home from his mission.  Which was  my worst nightmare.  I have felt more emotions then I knew was possible!.  It's been a good and hard month as we have tried to regroup and move forward.  I had been counting down the days for him to go so I could get my Emilee back and let her have 2 years to breathe and find herself.  Him coming home took that away.  Even though they aren't seeing each other very much she is still very connected to him with her phone.  More then anything I want Emilee to figure our who she is separate of a boy or anyone else.  I want her to figure out what she wants in her life and what she truly believes.  I think she is good at telling everyone what they want to hear.  She hasn't had enough life experience to know what she wants.  She is mature in many ways but so young and naïve in others. I want the world for my girl!!  She is so capable and talented and has the whole world a head of her.  And above anything I want her to be happy.  Truly happy!!  I pray everyday that she can be strong!  That she can figure out what Heavenly Father has in store for her life and that she will know what is best for her and have the courage to do it!  I know it's been a really hard month for her and I am proud of her for handling it all as well as she has. This next year is terrifying for me.  My last year having her home with me where I really get a say.  I  know she is counting down the days until she can be on her own and free.  It is the hardest thing I have ever had to do so far in my life.  I feel her slipping through my fingertips and all I want to do is hold on tighter.  This month I have learned that being a parent is the hardest thing there is to do.  It is HARD!!  Terrifying, heartbreaking, and can make you crazy.  But I also have felt a whole new level of love and a desire to protect and fix her heart ache.  I love my Emilee and always will forever!!


* I am grateful for great parents who took Em in for the weekend when he first got home and loved and counseled with her.  They are the best and I so glad that my kids love them too!


*I'm grateful for a loving family for their texts and calls to check on us all.  Especially Nicole!


*I am grateful for a wise and loving Bishop who made both of our hearts feel a better.


*I am grateful for Jason who has been my best friend and partner through it all.  I have felt a deeper love for him as I have watched him hurt and show such a deep love for Emilee.  His council and love to her has been unbelievable to me.  I am so glad that he is the head of our family!  He is an amazing dad!


*I am so grateful for Maddy, Saib, and Cam!! They have been angels to Emilee!!



*I am grateful that Emilee has MATC.  It has been a blessing in her life.


*Max separated his shoulder in football.  I am grateful for Bob Norton and his mad scientist friend Jim who has worked his magic and hopefully healed his shoulder.


* I am SO grateful for Dr. Taylor and Melissa!  They have put me on all of these vitamins and hopefully they will help me.


*Went to the temple last night with Jay.  I have never felt more love for him in my life then I did in the chapel waiting for our session.  I was completely overwhelmed by this feeling of warmth, peace, and love. (Went through for Sarah Womack, a family name)


*Jayne gave our family night on Monday.  Cutest and funniest night EVER!!!  She had everything set up on the cedar chest with a blanket it over it and we didn't know what to expect.  She starts by pulling out a glass mason jar and explains that when we talk to Heavenly Father we talk out loud so he can hear us.  Then she bangs on the jar with a spoon to make a noise loudly.  Then she gets a bottle of perfume and sprays in and explains that Heavenly Father speaks back to us quietly like a whisper of a spray of perfume:)  Then she pulls out different pictures of Christ and talks about them.  When she gets to the picture of the Garden of Gethsemane, she says, "Jesus went to the secret grove to ask Heavenly Father which church is true."  Then she pulls out another glass jar that is full of little pieces of broken bread and tells us to remember him and eat the bread and then passes around a blue camping water bottle and tells us to have a drink of water.  We all were laughing so hard we could hardly keep a straight face.  She is the cutest little girl and makes our house so happy.  She loves to make things special and put a lot of time and effort into that family night.  I love her and hope she always loves the gospel and wants to have family night!


*I had my 41st birthday this week.  I love how my family tries hard to make it a special day.  Emilee bought me a new cute shirt.  Lucy wrote 41 things she loved about me and it was the cutest. Jayne wrapped up all kinds of presents for me that she found around the house and painted me the cutest butterfly.  Max and Abbie sent me cute texts saying they loved me and Jason took me shopping, to lunch, and came home from work with beautiful red roses and my favorite chocolates.  I love my family!!!!  We went to Abbie's volleyball games  in Westlake and to kneaders in between.



Wednesday

August 26

* Watching Lucy play in her first competitive soccer game last night.  She is definitely a soccer player!  She scored one of the teams two goals and played soo tough!!  She was all about bumping and getting her way on that field!:)
*Walking in the rain this morning with all of the neighbor ladies.
*I love that Emilee is so dependable and wakes herself up every morning and gets to school on time.
*Spotify. It get's me through my days.
*Neighbors to help me carpool to school and all of my kids sports stuff.  I couldn't do it without them!

Tuesday

August 25

*Watching my two littlest girls at the bus stop together.  They had matching colored jeans on with white shirts and their hair slicked back in buns.  Lucy left last and Jayne yelled "Lucy I saved you a spot in line."  I love those two so much!
*I love that the bus stop is in our front yard!
*Getting to walk after the bus leaves and all my kids are gone.
*Waffles and peaches and cream for dinner last  night that Emilee made.  I love her help!!
*Bowling for FHE last night and everyone was there.  Including EM!! Jayne won us all.
*Jason holds me every night before we go to sleep.  Best part of my day!
*Shooting with Max at the church and getting to rebound for him.  Yesterday he drove us to the church because he got his permit.  He made a really wide turn and I told him that he didn't need to go out that far and he said "I thought it was a round-a-bout.:) He had his new Air Jordan's on and told me that "it really helps my vertical and brings me luck.  I have a completely different mindset now!":)
*Yesterday was Abbie and Lucy's last guitar lesson for now.  Life is too busy.  I love picking them up and seeing them come out laughing and hearing all about Gary.  I love that they are best friends.
*I went and watched Abbie tryout for Volleyball last night.  She is amazing!!

Thursday

August 19

*First day of school.  Everyone looked so cute and had big smiles on their faces when they headed out the door.  The tears came on and off all day long.  Life is crazy how things change.
*I'm so glad that Max and Abbie have each other at Jr. High and Lucy and Jayne have each other at school.
*A long walk with Shauna, Jeanette, and Heather after the kids got on the bus.
*A BUSY day getting ready for our Back to school dinner and FHE.  We had roast, creamed potaotes and peas, creamed corn off the cob, fresh beans from the garden, watermelon, and Tres Leches cake.  Our theme was Rise Above.  I want my kids to know that they can be different then their friends and others at school.  Just because we are surrounded by different values and standards we don't have to do the same.  We can be different & stronger and judge our standards by the Lords standards.
*I have a hard working husband.  He was at Aspen  Lakes until 9:00 tonight and never stops.
*Emilee liked MATC for the first day.
*Everyone came home with smiles for the most part.
*Jayne FINALLY had her first dance class at Wasatch Ballet with Ellie.  She has anxiously waiting for this day for years!  She came home tapping and dancing all around the house for the rest of the night.

August 18th

* More back to school shopping with the kids. I'm grateful that we can afford to get our kids what they need to feel ready and confident for school.
*Saw Emilee working and took her lunch.
* The excitement in Jayne as she picked out a matching Sophia the First backpack to go with her lunch box.
*Back to school advice and blessings from their dad.  I was a MESS!  I can't remember a time that  I cried so hard.  It is hard having a Senior and a first grader in the same year. This will be the first time in almost 18 years that they will all be at school all day.  This transition is brutal!  Where has the time gone when I had a house of little people?
*Jayne had a paper that she wrote blessings on and everyone's name and after each blessing she would check off their name and call the next person. :)
*Every blessing was so amazing and perfect for that child.  As I listened and watched each of their faces, I had such an AMAZING amount of love for each child.  I am the luckiest mom.
*Then he ended with the most incredible blessing for me. Just what I needed and the best blessing I can every remember having.  I love Jason!!
*Jayne faked crying the whole time because she saw us emotional.

Friday

August 7 2015

It's been awhile.... I am needing to stop and count my blessings in my life right now and focus on the good around me. 

*Rereading some of my past gratitude posts.  I have had the best life and it's a good reminder of some great past memories.  I miss my little kids!!
*   Braiding Lucy's hair in a rope braid crown around her head.  She looks darling today.  Still am far from being good at hair but she makes me try:)
* Spent some quality time with Max today.  Took him around to sell his food truck cards for football.  We both hate it and I end up hiding in my car while he goes to the door.  Im grateful for those nice neighbors who say yes!  (Van Broderick)
* Then I took Max down to the DMV so Max could get his permit.  Waited in a HUGE line and then remembered we didn't have his birth certificate. DUH!  So we left.  We need that done before school starts.
*  Dr. Taylor!!  I took Max with me yesterday and he adjusted him for the first time.  I hope it helps him!  I feel bad he has inherited my bad back.  When I watched him play football the other night it was like watching an old man move and run.
* Raisin Bran
* Texts from Emilee.  She is at Sea World today with Chantz.  Hope all is well!
* Sleeping with our bedroom fan on every night.
* Watching the first Republican debate last night.  It's all starting again.
* Lucy will clean Bluebee's bowl!